After last week’s message about Resilience Habits, I received this wonderful reply from a reader. I was so grateful for the reminder that no matter how awful the situation, we all have the power to make it at least a little bit better!  

About those resilience habits! I once had a supervisor whose habits made my job more difficult – as well as unpleasant. After years together, I would automatically suck my teeth or do an eye roll before I picked up her call or heard her approaching. When I realized my own negativity, I DID NOT LIKE IT. I did not like my own behavior, especially since I’m usually a glass half FULL kinda girl. I felt I was foolishly giving away my “power” – losing personal focus. I wanted it BACK! I was reminded that God is bigger than anything I faced. I began praying about her, for a better, more balanced work relationship and for her personal well-being. I tried being purposely attentive when she wanted to talk, asking about her children and mate. She began coming to me for parenting tips. She even reported back and thanked me for my advice! The internal work paid off!

She had not changed in ‘work behavior’ or habits as much as I had internally. But my inner monologue began to shift and I soon began to see the difficulties she brought me as challenges instead. With prayer, I purposed to overcome and/or change my approach to those challenges. After more time, I actually began to appreciate the challenges as opportunities to become a better, stronger, mentally healthier version of me, and a better employee to her. Relief came when she left for a better position. But now I was invested: I truly wanted her to succeed and grow. And she did!

The most valuable takeaway for me was I’d already won – I would very soon be in possession of my solution – when I accepted the fact the work had to start within ME – not with whatever challenge (person, place, or thing) I faced at the time.

Ah, I do love the word S O L U T I O N.