I stepped in it this week. Interestingly, I was also hired as a coach by a leader who also, in a very different way, made a big mistake. We all make mistakes, some of us more than others. So how can we prepare, learn from them, and recover well?

Over the years, I’ve watched incredibly smart, well-intentioned professionals turn a small misstep into a much bigger issue, sometimes based on what they did but more often because of what they did next.

Here are a few of the most common errors I see after the mistake:

They get quiet.

Instead of addressing the issue, they hope it will go unnoticed or resolve itself. It rarely does. Silence creates confusion at best and mistrust at worst.

They overexplain.

This is a big one, and there’s a difference between context and justification. When people feel uncomfortable, they often fill the space with explanations that sound like excuses. It dilutes accountability. Let me repeat that IT DILUTES ACCOUNTABILITY!!!

They take it personally.

A mistake becomes “I’m bad at this” instead of “Something went wrong here.” That shift matters. One leads to growth. The other leads to hesitation and self-protection. In graduate school we did a role play that I still remember called the focus ball. When the focus of the apology means that your colleagues are comforting you, the focus is in the wrong place.

So what should you do?

Acknowledge the mistake clearly.

No hedging. No softening. “I missed that deadline.” “I didn’t give you credit.” “I gave you the wrong information.”

Next, move to action.

“Here’s what I’m doing to address it.” “Here’s what I’ll do differently next time.”

And, if you have hurt someone, they may prefer that you stop talking about it entirely. That is THEIR choice, not yours.

If you aren’t feeling good about things, you may need more time to process and want to talk more. I invite you to do so, but not to your colleagues and not at work. This is a time for a trusted friend, career coach, or therapist.

Your reaction to your mistake doesn’t need to be perfect, just clear and accountable. In our heads, we think credibility comes from getting everything right, but no one ever does. Credibility comes from how you show up when something goes wrong. Handled well, a mistake can actually build trust. People learn that you are honest, that you take ownership, and that you can be counted on to course-correct.

Can you think of a time when you or a colleague handled a situation well? I would love to hear about it!